“Watch your thoughts they become your words.
Watch your words they become your actions.
Watch your actions they become your habits.
Watch your habits, they become your character.
Watch your character it becomes your destiny.”
Frank Outlaw provides a powerful insight into the relationship between how we think and the quality of life we live. The words we use inside our own heads are powerful. They are the foundation of our reality. Most of us do not reveal to others the highly negative manner we use to talk to ourselves.
Often, we are more understanding and willing to extend grace to others than we are do for ourselves. This results in talking to ourselves in highly critical ways. I wonder what would happen if we talked to ourselves in the same way we talk to others? What would happen if we gave ourselves the benefit of the doubt? Would this impact our quality of life? I believe that the answer to these questions is “yes.”
When we use words with negative value towards ourselves, we create a negative foundation for our destiny. It is possible to make a shift to a more positive self-talk vocabulary. It does take work. However, making a change like this can feel strange and sometimes uncomfortable.
One place to start, is spending a short amount of time each day identifying things that you are grateful for. When making this list, include things you are grateful for about yourself. This is an important step to move towards a positive way of thinking. Being grateful works best when you are specific and avoid repeats. To avoid repeats, try taking something new from each day to be grateful for.
In relation to other healthy living habits, this is a simple concept but not an easy one. Being intentional with self-talk is the first step in making a positive impact on our quality of life. In Jon Gordon’s book “Positive Dog,” he talks about the difference between “talking to yourself” and “listening to yourself.” This demonstrates the important difference between giving credibility to whatever pops into our mind and being intentional with our thoughts.
So, in order to create the destiny you want for your life, start by being positive towards yourself. While there are many other steps to take, being positive can be a powerful first step.
By: Eric Hansen
LMSW, LMAC, CADC,